This article is of boring chicken soup style.
First year after graduation
During my first job, I got fired just before finishing probation period. The next day was Mid-Autumn Festival, and I didn’t dare to tell my family. Actually I had tough time in this job. When I joined the company, I nearly knew nothing about programming, and what was worse, my teammates were impatient to guide me. Everyday I worked with stress and felt nervous. I had thought about quit, but I didn’t know what I would like to do and what I could do. I totally didn’t understand myself and had no clue about the future.
After the “fire”work, I had joined two companies but finally quit. I found myself cannot manage to raise passion and confidence in the work. The fear of being fired always bordered me when I faced difficulties from work. That made me cannot concentrate on solving problems and even building my skills. I was like a walking dead coming and leaving office on time, and my heart was like a boat on the sea under a horrible storm.
Finally I decided my last try on application level development and joined a startup. At first my fear still triggered once I faced difficulties in development. It spread so wide that I even escaped from team conversation about the project. “Why life is so tough? I should find an easier way to make my living.” This voice almost persuaded me to quit this fourth job until I heard another voice from my heart that I couldn’t always escape from difficulties. Since they could always find me, I had got to be strong and defeat them. Even for now I still feel grateful for my heart raising anger and pride on myself. Anger was because of being a coward for such a long time when facing troubles , and pride kept me carry on so as to win respect from myself. I knew the first thing I needed was a long term goal. Although I had a tough time during work, coding still gave me a lot of excitement and sense of success in many moments. I enjoyed the process of creation by establishing logics through coding. So I thought: “Hum, since coding is what I like and the way to make my living, I can probably regard it as career and give any sacrifice that I can to see how far I can go.”
Everyday when I faced temptation (e.g. laziness) or difficulties, I reminded myself what I was chasing and who I wanted to be. After a few weeks, I found myself have a better resistance against temptation and can have fun solving difficulties. Meanwhile I had tried many ways to enhance my passion, such as watching “hot blood” anime, watching talk show “开讲啦”, and learning spirits from NBA players. Among them, Kobe Bryant is the one who has deepest influence on my attitude towards myself, life, and the world.
Kobe Bryant, the fighter against the world
There is a joke saying that Kobe has 1.3 billion fans in China. I don’t know how other people understand Kobe, I only know that I am deeply influenced by Kobe’s attitude in different roles: fighter on the court, gentleman in daily life.
I cannot find a game that Kobe didn’t burn all his energy and concentration. It’s easy to tell whether a player is eager to win from his eyes. Off the court, Kobe can make jokes with his teammates; on the court, Kobe changes to another personality with incredible focus and aggression. His focus, sacrifice and fearlessness is so true that my fighting spirit has been raised. Kobe fought back against those who doubted about his personality and ability with a question asking whether they have seen what Los Angeles looks like at 4am in the morning. Never say never if you haven’t sacrificed all that you can give, otherwise you heart will feel guilty and regretful.
how strong a fight heart should be for a man to show fearless on incoming challenge
Battlefields are everywhere in life. When the alarm clock rings in weekend’s morning, you choose to keep sleeping or wake up and do whatever is good for you? When you go back home after work, you choose to lie down to reward yourself with a rest or go for exercise? The battles between “primitive self” and “rational self” always happen when facing a choice. To stand on “rational self” side and win important battles against “primitive self”, I need a firm long-term goal with passion and “hot blood”. That’s what Kobe’s spirit has driven me to carry on along the journey towards the goal. The following saying may seems conceit in some people’s eyes, but I think if someone doesn’t want to win, he/she can’t take out enough sacrifice to catch his/her dream. I think that is the beauty of competition.
“Somebody has to win, so why not me?”
Oh, share one of my favourite mottos:
What hurts more: the pain of hard work, or the pain of regret?
Although Kobe is a fighter on the court, in daily life he is a gentleman and a true boy who is always generous showing true feelings to people around. He has sympathy and his words are usually unreserved. He can also be humorous and create active atmosphere. You can say he does all these things because of commercial consideration, but I doesn’t care whether these characteristics are from Kobe’s true heart. What I feel is that the emotions behind these behaviors are so loyal to the heart, and so true as a human. Kobe’s calmness against any criticism and doubts inspires me that someone should always be confident in what he/she believes. The world is so noisy that you got to give yourself some time to listen to your heart, and get along well with all your feelings.
Along the life journey, your curiosity and sympathy are enough to explore the world. Thanks Kobe, for picking me up in the battle against life troubles. Thanks myself, for not giving up in life.
Don’t you feel this article boring?
In before I didn’t like writing or recording anything about my life. Now I feel interesting in sharing anything about what I have experienced and my thoughts, although some
of them seems “non-nutritive”. 
If you somehow complete reading this article, congratulations! You have a strong mind in self-control. I believe it is your weapon
towards success. 
